Happy Valentine’s Day! Or is it? Valentine’s Day is a Hallmark holiday for sure.  But there is something wonderful about expressing out loud your adoration for your loved ones. If you are not happy in your marriage then a day that celebrates romantic love may feel like a punch in the gut rather than a warm hug.  You may find it strange to learn that as a divorce mediator I am not pro-divorce.  But I am pro-mediation if you have decided to get a divorce. 

But what if you have not yet decided what you want to do.  Sometimes people ride the wave of the unhappiness until reaching a new wave of contentment in their marriage.  But what if that new wave never comes. How much time will you allow before deciding to make some changes?  This is a question only you can answer for your own life.  Every person’s answer is different. 

It is often helpful to have some factual information.  Scheduling a consult with a divorce mediator can help you get some data about what the divorce process entails. After meeting with a professional divorce mediator at Westfield Mediation, LLC, you will have a better sense of what you will have to go through to get to the other side of a divorce.  And it is not the dragged out, outrageously expensive, horror stories you see in movies or on TV. During the consult you will learn how the court process works in New Jersey.  These are the steps you have to take to officially get divorced.  This is how long it may last.  This is how much it may cost.  These are the decisions you will have to make.  This is how mediation can help you and your spouse reach these decisions.  Divorce mediation has many benefits.  It allows you to remain in control of the process, keep costs low, to move at your own pace (not the courts), and remain confidential.  I am not rooting for you to get a divorce, but I am also not rooting for you to remain in an unhappy marriage because you feel you have no choice.  Gathering accurate information about your options may help you decide.